I have to admit for my whole adult life in the eyes of the world I have been poor. But I knew that God had all the money in the world, that He owned everything, and everything we have happens to be on loan from Him. I knew when I needed something God would provide and usually it was with product and not money.
I didn’t know that for the past 13 years of walking with the Lord that I began to have a fear of money. Just recently the Lord showed me that I was afraid that if I ever got “lots” of money that I would turn away from God. Scriptures like this fed into my fear of money :
Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” – Matthew 19:24
There is no way I wanted to go to hell and want money over God. So I kind of avoided it and only asked God for it when there was a major need like bills.
On every spectrum there are two extremes. Both extremes are unhealthy like being super skinny or being super fat. Either one is not good for you. Or Driving way too fast or driving way too slow, either way are dangerous. It is the same with money. To have the love of money is evil:
For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.
– 1 Timothy 6:10.
What does the love of money look like. Well it can be as subtle as always striving for a job that pays more, or working long hours to make more, or being cheap with gifts to people so you don’t have to spend your money. Those are some subtle ways. If you think about money all the time. If every decision you make has to do with money, most likely you love money. No good right!?!
Then there is the other side of the scale. The side I camped out on. The fear of money. Where I only wanted enough to live on. I didn’t want an abundance at all. I was afraid that if Joel and I ever did get money that I would walk away from the Lord because I would feel secure and safe in it. Though I knew better, that money honestly doesn’t mean security from this scripture:
The seed falling among the thorns refers to someone who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, making it unfruitful.
– Matthew 13:22
I had a poverty mindset when it came to money. I was more the poverty gospel than the prosperity gospel. Both extremes are bad! During my time with the Lord as He was showing me this He revealed to me that I had made a vow of poverty.
I asked, “How Lord.” He showed me saying years ago, “I would never ask any one for money ever.”
God said, “That included Me as well.” Joel and I made a vow that we felt God was putting on our heart to make that we would never let any one know our needs, that if God is all knowing, and if we seek the kingdom of God and righteousness first, and if we ask Him He would supply everything we needed.
“Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.”
– Matthew 6:33 (NLT)
But in doing so I also made a vow on my own by saying “I will never ask any one for money EVER” I didn’t realize I had added God to the equation. So I had to repent and ask for forgiveness for telling God I would never ask Him for money. When I did I felt this lightness come on me. Holy Spirit started to show me that in the past I could not even say the word money to God when I prayed. It was true any time I asked God for “money” I would say God please provide the finances or provision we need. The vow was so strong I wouldn’t even say the word to the Lord. I was ashamed to ask Him for money.
Also as the Lord talked to me about my unhealthy relationship with money He showed me that money is just a tool. It not only is used to provide for our family but it needs to be used as a tool to further the kingdom of God. When God puts on my heart to give to someone in need that I need to do so. That I should always be looking for opportunities to help the poor, serve the needy, buy things, or give money to those God is putting on my heart. That when He does give us money I need to make sure my family is taken care of but then look outward to helping others. That is how I can use money to further God’s kingdom. Think about the times you were in need and someone provided. Didn’t it bring you to your knees and out of your mouth came “Thank you God!” Why because you know ultimately where the gift came from. YOu knew that God is a provider through people, through the job through whatever. Ultimately God is in control and if you trust Him and put Him first He will take care of everything you need.
Your relationship with money needs to be a healthy one. It needs to be in the middle between loving money and fearing money. You need to have the right perspective in what money really is: a tool. And who Ultimately is your provider: God. I love the verse in Hosea where God is talking about Israel and how they thought that everyone but God was their provider but in all reality it was the Almighty giving what they needed:
She (Israel) said, ‘I will go after my lovers,
who give me my food and my water,
my wool and my linen, my olive oil and my drink.’
6 Therefore I (God) will block her path with thornbushes;
I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way.
7 She will chase after her lovers but not catch them;
she will look for them but not find them.
Then she will say,
‘I will go back to my husband as at first,
for then I was better off than now.’
8 She has not acknowledged that I (God) was the one
who gave her the grain, the new wine and oil,
who lavished on her the silver and gold—– Hosea 2:5-6
We have to realize that God not Money is our provider. We need the right perspective that money is a tool not the ultimate”source” of helping our family and others. We need to not fear money because God is gracious and when we are temped He will give us an escape so we do not sin or go down the wrong path:
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.– 1 Corinthians 10:13
Where are you when it comes to money do you love it, fear it, or have a healthy relationship with it. What about other things in your life. Is there anything you are an extremist on that you need to ask God to help balance you out? God is a great counselor he will lead you to the right way of thinking about things. He is also a great balancer, the Lord will help you balance your life so you are thinking and acting in healthy ways!
It’s time to seek the Lord what you need to balance out!